Rêverie.

“Paris, je t’aime!” Molly exclaimed enthusiastically across the living room from the kitchen of our rented apartment. I have been staring out the window into the hard-pouring rain for an hour already, battling with the temptation to feed, to appease my intense head-ache with an aspirin instead of a plate of pasta she made. A beast in my head rages! A demon, pulling the brain nerves apart, attempting to break its way into the world through my temples…

“Argh!” I screamed as another pair of nerves were separated and as to diminish the pain, I massaged the temples with my fingers. Like the mythical Pegasus, Molly came to my aid, asking about the Chimera behind the evident imprints of pain on my face.

“What is it, dear? Is your head hurting again?” I nodded, the Bellerophon in battle. She frowned – “It’s been two days already!” She looked out the window, the shadows of water drops on her pale, wide face. “Look, David – there’s Paris, right outside! And we haven’t seen any of it, because of your headaches. I don’t want to see it without you – it was your dream too, to come here – so just do something about those bloody headaches!” She glanced at the pain killers. “Take one and we’ll go out.” I looked at her; poor thing, so full of optimism, hope, so loyal… It is  only a matter of time until her own lightning will lead to her downfall.

I looked at the pill that she now held on her palm and the glass of water in her other hand – but still, I shook my head. Molly sighed loudly and looked away in annoyance:

“Bloody hell! You said you were looking forward to our week here – but all you’ve been capable of doing is whine, be all dramatic about your head-aches and… Honestly! You don’t even sleep, and you wonder why you’re tired!” I shoot a lightning from my eyes at her.

“I just cannot sleep.” She slapped her thigh sarcastically –

“Yeah, the king cannot sleep, but spends all night staring at the wall. Pity, let’s pity him for not being able to rule his kingdom!” I dropped my head, giving in.

“If you wish, go out yourself. I’ll stay here.” Molly froze, but then nodded, got her purse and ‘I love Paris’ umbrella and before shutting the door, she stopped to say:

“David, please, get some sleep. Don’t let your dreams get the better of you.” I silently nodded, turned my head towards the window again and listened to the door close.

I was alone, with my thoughts. Suddenly, I got the sudden impulse to go and have a bath. Laboriously, I walked into the bathroom and began filling the tub with hot water. As it filled up, I undressed myself and then got in. It was so hot, my body quickly turned red, but I somehow didn’t mind. For the first time during our stay, I noticed the small window on the wall near my feet; the notes of some string quartet piece flew out of it (from some café or restaurant, it was late evening after all) and to it, I and the Chimera in my head fell into a state of halcyon called sleep.

***

What seemed like a short while later, I woke up – the water was somehow spilling out the bath, though I remembered it wasn’t that full… Still slightly hung-over by sleep, I noticed an unknown figure standing by the open door of the bathroom. Expecting it to be Molly, I was surprised to turn my head and see that it was an unfamiliar girl. A young girl, dressed in a dirty dress, short, brown hair and boots – it was a working-class outfit, as if from a different century. I stared at her for a while, trying to comprehend how she came about. Then, I realised my nudity and tried to cover myself with some bubbles that still floated on the water surface.

“C’est rien” a tender voice of a child broke the silence. Before I continue, if you do not mind, I will continue to use the original French dialogues for the rest of this tale – only please excuse their simplicity, I do not know how many of my readers are erudite in this Francophone language. So, the next thing she said was: “Habillez-vous rapidement, Monsieur! On doit partir immédiatement” and left me to get out the tub and dress into the first pants and shirt I found and join her in the living room. She looked at me – indeed, she was young, 12-years of age, I thought, and truly poor-looking, I concluded… I then asked where it is that we are to go?

“Chez mon ami.” She responded and took me by the hand – hers was a very cold one, almost like of a dead person. Why? “On ira!” She pulled me after her impatiently out of the apartment, the door of the apartment shut itself as if by some invisible force and just as I began panicking that I had no belongings with me, we were already standing outside on the street. Where does that friend of yours live? I asked.

“La-bas, Monsieur” she replied. Suddenly, the sound of some large clock or church bells echoed through the streets – and at that very moment, my anonymous companion’s face twisted in sudden panic. “On doit partir! Il reste tres peu de temps.” Why? I demanded, but did not receive a response – for we were rushing through the midnight Paris narrow streets until we reached a half-broken-down house.

***

A woman in dark rags stood by its door. The girl let go of my hand and the woman smiled at me:

“Bienvenue, Monsieur. Suivez-moi.” Again, I obeyed and followed her into a small room that was lit by candles. She nudged for me to sit down on a stool – I did so, when suddenly she took my hand and began studying it. I never believed in fortune-telling; to be honest, I was always rather sceptical about it. Still, I let her study my hand – and tell me what future was embedded in my palm. After a while, in a low voice, she warned me of the following: a lady with the sun behind her head, a granite neck, a singer who can never sing again. I felt like laughing, but based on her tone and facial expression, I kept it in. “Marie!” she called the girl, who ran into the room quickly, then took me by the arm and led us away. I only got a glimpse of the fortune-teller as we left the room; for reasons unknown, she looked sad, broken. I did not have time to wonder why in peace until we reached the road in front of the house. Marie looked at me and said:

“C’est bien que nous n’étions pas en rétard.” Why, again? I asked. The girl turned her head towards the house, still holding my hand – and I spotted a woman in a seemingly camouflage-patterned uniform, standing on the staircase inside the building we have just got out of. It was still dark, but a lit lamp was above her head, making her more visible than anything else before. She was smiling, almost warmly and the moment I smiled back, I realised something is wrong… Yes, the woman had a small metal bottle that she opened and that’s content she began spilling around her feet. It was shining, denser-looking than water – she could not look at the floor as she did it, she kept staring at Marie and me, as if her neck made it impossible. That was the moment when I realised something is wrong, as the bottle in the momentary ray of lamp-light suddenly got the shape of a granite… Marie and I watched her, until the moment the girl smiled at me herself and said: “Ne paniquez-pas, Monsieur. Tout sera bientot terminé.”

***

Again, I did not understand – and stronger than before, I demanded her to tell me, to explain herself! What will end soon? Marie looked at me, her eyes reflecting the light of the staircase lamp in the near distance – or the moon? Calmly, she responded:

“Ce rêverie, Monsieur” and turned her head back towards the building. The next thing I knew, the building was on fire – and Marie looked at me: “Au revoir Monsieur” and ran and jumped into the growing flames. As if frozen, I kept standing on the very same spot… I wanted to run into the flames and drag at least Marie out of there, but the moment I tried, a giant flame sprung towards me – it resembled a monster, a Chimera in shape and intimidating, dominant and violent nature. This pushed me back, but what horrified me more than anything else was the high-pitched screams of pain that came out of the building – I recognised the fortune-teller’s rags, once black, now covered in red fire, walk towards the staircase by which the young unknown woman in a uniform and poor little Marie stood in a close embrace. The three females hugged each other, weeping, crying in pain and agony, while the Chimera mercilessly tortured them with his fiery whips.

I did not know why, but still, I was unable of moving forward and helping them. Surely, I thought, there must be people living in the other buildings! Where are the fire-fighters? The cloud of smoke coming out of the falling-apart building was apocalyptic; it must be visible even from miles away! But no, the only sounds were the excruciatingly intense cries of the women. I felt increasingly desperate – why am I watching this atrocity take place, what does it all even mean? Then I realised: it was the same Chimera that tortured my head for the past few days! At that moment I also comprehended that while my body disobeyed my nerve impulses, my mouth functioned properly. So I used all the air in my lungs to scream at the Chimera:

“Stop it! Stop it, you vicious beast!” Still, it continued in its deed. I continued: “Chimera! If you must torture them, why don’t you torture me instead? Finish me off, not them!” The Chimera’s head suddenly stopped roaring at the inflamed women and moved slowly towards me. “Finish me off, I beg you!” I continued, as our eyes met. “Take me, kill me. It’s your chance, finish me like Bellerophon killed you. Chop my head off with thy mighty mouth, serve yourself.” The Chimera smiled, the women suddenly stopped crying – bewildered, they closed their mouths. The flames began calming down, but into the growing silence, Marie screamed:

“Non!” I looked at her for the last time, the half-burnt face of a young innocent, poor girl. And I continued to watch her until the moment the Chimera jumped with its mouth wide-open towards my head…

***

“Wake up, dear! Wake up, the water is cold, you’ll get sick.” I felt somebody’s hand intensely shaking my shoulder – I was surprised and relieved to open my eyes and see that it was Molly. Birds were chirping outside, it was morning, light came out of the small window, shining onto my naked body that was covered in goose bumps. I looked at my Pegasus, who always knew when to save me. “What was it, did you have a dream?” I nodded. She smiled: “You know, Paris is one big dream come true!” she boasted. I smirked.

“If you show me your dream come true, I’ll tell you about the one I just had.” Molly grinned and rubbed my head like one would to a dog:

“That’s my David! Get dressed and let’s go out. Is your head-ache gone?” I nodded.

“Yes. The Chimera was fed.” She frowned, a questioning look on her face.

“I’ll tell you later.” I explained simply, then got out of the tub and dressed – ready to experience another, hopefully more positive dream.

THE END